The Pukey Little Puppy

I’ve written plenty about milk.  The squirting boobs, the different kinds of milk vomit (thick and ropey vs. curds and whey), the wet t-shirts.  I have neglected one aspect of it, however.  The décor potential!

We have this ceramic tile in our kitchen and baths.  I suppose it’s supposed to be some kind of faux slate, which as a geologist, offends me deeply.  As I was relieving my bladder the other day while brushing my teeth (yay for multitasking!!), I noticed all kinds of white dots all over the place.  I guess I thought at first it was either toothpaste or some kind of soap residue from Will (have you ever noticed how men can get toothpaste absolutely everywhere?).  I didn’t think much of it.  I then began noticing that these white spots were everywhere, including the laminate floor in the hall and living room, the coffee table, the kitchen….

I should insert at this point a bad homemaker confession:  I have not mopped much since the baby was born.  I do sweep, sure, and whenever one of our three stupid cats barfs or we spill something I wipe it up ASAP.  But my fastidious mopping that I used to do pre-baby is no more.  It was one of the sacrifices my new time-crunched existence demanded.

At any rate, it seems my house is covered in milk spots, whether direct from the source, the bottle, or recycled from the kid.  I was wondering if it would help to have a dog at these moments.  Dogs will eat just about anything, including poo.  Surely they would lap up cap puke, baby puke, and spilled breast milk?

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About larva225

Working mom. Is there any other kind? Geologist. Nerd.
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One Response to The Pukey Little Puppy

  1. Jamie says:

    I’m sure any puppy would love it 🙂 LOL

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