The Pukey Little Puppy

I’ve written plenty about milk.  The squirting boobs, the different kinds of milk vomit (thick and ropey vs. curds and whey), the wet t-shirts.  I have neglected one aspect of it, however.  The décor potential!

We have this ceramic tile in our kitchen and baths.  I suppose it’s supposed to be some kind of faux slate, which as a geologist, offends me deeply.  As I was relieving my bladder the other day while brushing my teeth (yay for multitasking!!), I noticed all kinds of white dots all over the place.  I guess I thought at first it was either toothpaste or some kind of soap residue from Will (have you ever noticed how men can get toothpaste absolutely everywhere?).  I didn’t think much of it.  I then began noticing that these white spots were everywhere, including the laminate floor in the hall and living room, the coffee table, the kitchen….

I should insert at this point a bad homemaker confession:  I have not mopped much since the baby was born.  I do sweep, sure, and whenever one of our three stupid cats barfs or we spill something I wipe it up ASAP.  But my fastidious mopping that I used to do pre-baby is no more.  It was one of the sacrifices my new time-crunched existence demanded.

At any rate, it seems my house is covered in milk spots, whether direct from the source, the bottle, or recycled from the kid.  I was wondering if it would help to have a dog at these moments.  Dogs will eat just about anything, including poo.  Surely they would lap up cap puke, baby puke, and spilled breast milk?


About larva225

Working mom. Is there any other kind? Geologist. Nerd.
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One Response to The Pukey Little Puppy

  1. Jamie says:

    I’m sure any puppy would love it 🙂 LOL

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