The Call of the Child

In the world of kid-dom, you quickly invent your own working language and jargon.  For instance, what do/will you call the pacifier?  “Pacifier” doesn’t exactly roll of the tongue.  We seem to have adopted “nu-nu,” perhaps because that’s what Stella’s nanny calls it at her house.  We’ve also adopted the “pee-pie” rendition of classic “peek-a-boo.”  That’s what I remember hearing growing up, so it stuck.

People are a bit more problematic.  You really do want the name to be cute/non-obnoxious, as once it’s set, it’s set.  I would hope that Stella will call me “mommy” vs. “mama.”  It’s just my personal preference.  However, I do concede that it’s kind of out of my hands.  As she still shows no signs of being interested in standard verbal communication, we’ll just have to wait and see.  Right now, everything and everyone is simply “gah.”  I know that all of the grandparents involved are pretty interested in how all that plays out, also.  My mom, Crispy (although we’re probably going to shift the spelling to “Crispi”) is pretty easy.  I think that will stick.  The others, not so much.  I had liked “meatloaf” for Will’s mom, but she vetoed that (and as the child is not yet speaking, that is certainly her right).  I like “Grumpy Joe” for my dad.  Ultimately, it will be Stella’s choice.  I hope like hell we don’t end up with a Paw Paw.  All I can think of is a ragged-out motor home when I hear that.  Stay tuned.

We also have created some of our own terms for random actions/things since becoming parents:

Cack (for those of you not paying attention): This originated as the sound she would make prior to crying/screaming.  It sounded like a dry silly cough.  The more cacks she released, the more dramatic the upcoming event.  You could almost equate it to a rattlesnake’s rattle.  It was a warning of things to come.  Over time, we lost the cacking sound.  However, it remains in the form as Stella’s nickname (also relevant to the discussion above).  She’ll probably hate it in 12 years, but she is now The Cack.

Angry Pigeon: This was the verb we invented to describe the projectile runny poos that would be ejected from The Cack’s young butt.  Obviously, we are well beyond that now.  I don’t miss it.  Nope, not at all.

Sneezebutt: This is a hazard of carrying around a baby during cold/allergy season.  The child cannot warn you that a sneeze is imminent.  It just happens.  When it does, her head will often violently crash into your own, resulting in pain, swelling, and sometimes a busted lip.

Butt Smuggling (get your mind out of the gutter, s’il vous plait): Often during feedings, Stella will make an impressive amount of food disappear.  I will often wonder how in the world she can possible contain it all in her little system  – until we get up from the high chair.  I frequently discover a whole food bank tucked under her butt.  What I can’t figure out is how it gets under her.  She can only shift and wiggle so much while contained in the chair, tray in place.  She’s also not quite devious enough to shove it under there herself.

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About larva225

Working mom. Is there any other kind? Geologist. Nerd.
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