For the record, while this IS a post about hair, it’s not like that previous post I made about the hair on my nether region. Just letting you know it’s safe to read.
So things are hairy around here, pun intended. I have 2 separate hair-related issues to share. I’ll get the no-fun one out of the way first. I’m losing hair like crazy. It’s the whole your-body-is-done-being-pregnant-and-now-you’re-dropping-all-that-extra-thick-hormone-hair phenomenon. It happened last time, too, so I have an inkling how alarming it can and probably will get. Hopefully other than the shower drain I won’t notice too much afterward. My hair was thick to begin with and stayed that way after Stella’s departure from the mother ship. I have noticed it no longer grows quite as fast, however, so I can no longer be as cavalier about having some random person just “whack” it when I get sick to death of it being long and shoved in a ponytail in perpetuity.
The other situation involves one of my 3 Stupid Cats and some of Stella’s dolls. Specifically, the hairy ones. She has several at this point. These are the dolls that have “real” hair vs molded plastic, although if they got near a spark or open flame it would quickly look the same. One of the Doras has this hair. We call her Hairy Dora (vs. Yellow Dora, Pink Dora, Fathead Dora, and Don’t Spit Dora). There’s also Hairy Baby (vs. Blue Baby, Green Baby, and Original Baby). Last but not least, we have these 2 awful McDonald’s Barbie Happy Meal toys which are ballerinas. I let them stay in the house since they end up in the Castle Jail while Master Chief roams free.
Anyway, each and every night before bed, I have to do a final toy sweep. This involves not just picking up the general clutter which could result in broken toes, but specifically the removal of toys which the Stupid Cats could do something, well, stupid with. Anything smallish and round becomes toys knocked against walls in the middle of the night. Hairy dolls get eaten. Yes, one of the Stupid Cats eats hair, real or otherwise. Once I busted him noshing on the hair in my brush, the nasty bastard. I have learned the unfortunate way that doll hair is no different. The hairball which follows this little snack is almost immediate and not the standard black color considering the Stupid Cats are all black. It’s disconcerting to see a black cat barfing up a blonde hairball. And where have YOU been, sir?