Behind Clothed Doors

The days of naked continue.  When I arrived yesterday to pick Stella up from her nanny’s, she was wearing nothing but a diaper.  Neither was her BFF, only in her case you can sub big girl panties for diaper.  Oh, and the BFF had shoes on, too.  I guess feeling modest when I showed up with the nanny’s eldest in tow (I am picking him up from school since there’s no way in hell she can put 3 car seats in her car to do so), Stella did go fetch a gold sparkly purse.  Accessories will draw your eye from naked every time.

Now that I’m at work, it’s funnier.  By the end of my maternity leave, however, it was old.  It was really old.  I think the worst part of it was that Stella seemed to be quite calculated about when she’d disrobe, waiting until the worst possible moment for me.  Like when I was nursing Felix and/or trying to talk on the phone and/or trying to eat and/or trying to go to the bathroom.  Despite the constant attempts to be naked, we had very few accidents, surprisingly.  It is just unsettling, though, knowing that horrible things could come from that cute little butt at any time without warning and generally over carpet.

Here she is with clothes AND copious amounts of dirt (photo credit Stella's nanny)

Here she is with clothes AND copious amounts of dirt (photo credit Stella’s nanny)

In my frustration, I had Googled naked toddlers.  That was another one of those internet searches that I found myself terrified of.  You could end up with all sorts of heartbreaking and horrible images or anecdotes rather than innocent if not irritating toddler antics.  Sure enough, it was a common search.  I read several inventive ideas, such as putting them in tight clothing or overalls.  I did go dig through Stella’s drawers for those.  Once upon a time when I was newly pregnant, Crispi and I went to the Osh Kosh b’Gosh outlet and came out with about 9 pairs in various sizes.  We went a little nuts.  Unfortunately, none of those were  toddler-sized, so no dice on the overalls.

Several other parents or “experts” suggested duct taping diapers on.  I was initially horrified or thought at least it was a joke.  Nope.  They were serious.  They were very careful to note that you don’t actually tape the diaper TO the kid, but rather reinforce the waistband with it.  I never tried it, but one day…

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About larva225

Working mom. Is there any other kind? Geologist. Nerd.
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