Stuck On You

My daughter has a love affair with her own hair.  Somehow, some way, “long beautiful hair” became her dedicated style.  I know that lots of little girls are this way.  Stella, however, wants hers down and flowing at all times.  Think Cousin Itt.  Whereas most little girls adore bows and frilly things in their tresses, mine doesn’t tolerate that so much.  Sure, there are days when she gets a wild hair (har har) and wants a very specific bow placed within her locks, but those are exceptions.  We’re fortunate in that she does allow her hair to be washed and brushed, and we insist on it being out of her face during meal times.  She leaves the house every day with her hair contained in one or more ponytails.  But you gotta believe our ponytail holder budget is higher than yours.

Occasionally she'll let me put it up when she's out playing....

Occasionally she’ll let me put it up when she’s out playing….


Rocking her pigtails and her best "I'll cut you" smile.

Rocking her pigtails and her best “I’ll cut you” smile.

But her hair.  It’s long.  It’s “beautiful mermaid” long, which is Stella’s description for herself.  We’re still all about beautiful mermaids.  Her hair has only been cut once when she was just over a year old at Crispi’s insistence to even it out.  So basically she’s never had a “real” haircut.

So yesterday.  It’s Wednesday.  I’m telecommuting and Will is home sick (thankfully in this case).  Will and Felix were napping when my phone rings.  It’s Stella’s school.  I love these people.  The first words out of the lady’s mouth were “Stella is fine!” But there was a but.  It seems she had gotten a roughly 1.5” diameter Velcro circle stuck in her hair waaaaaayyyyy up near the scalp.  It was really stuck.  Stuck good.  3 different people had attempted to remove it to no avail stuck.  I kind of laughed and said that detangling spray was on my grocery list, and, um, was this something that could wait until after school for me to deal with?  Weeeellllll, Stella wasn’t taking it so well.  She was screaming and pitching a Class A fit, understandably, I think.  While the school didn’t think I needed to pick her up, could I please come see about Velcro extraction?

Well merde.  Merde does, indeed, happen.

I woke Will up for Felix duty and went tearing out of the house, knowing full well that poor Ms. T was trying to put the class down for naps and Stella’s howling wouldn’t be so conducive for that.  I also anticipated that Stella would, in fact, be coming home with me.  Once she sees me, that’s it.  Mommy at school = going home time.  I was armed with detangling spray, safety scissors, and a detangling comb.  At stop lights, I was frantically Googling “Velcro stuck in hair.”  Apparently lots of people have issues using Velcro hair rollers.  Bloody frakking useless.

I got to the school and went running to the classroom.  I was immediately struck by the silence.  Ms. T was sweeping up a bit while nice mellow music played.  All the kiddos were stretched out slumbering on their mats, including Stella.  I asked Ms. T what she thought I should do (meaning how do I deal with Stella without waking the whole damn class) and she said she had no idea (meaning how to get the stupid Velcro out).

Long story short, I ended up yanking and to a smaller extent cutting Velcro out of my daughter’s hair while she took a nap.  SHE SLEPT THROUGH THE WHOLE THING.  I snuck away with my souvenir.  Ms. T thought I should put it in her scrapbook.  I was told when I came back later to pick my daughter up that she immediately woke and put her hand on her head looking for the offending item.  I guess she thinks the Velcro fairy came in her sleep.

To share, there is no good way to get Velcro out of a kid’s hair.  A second set of hands would have been nice to bundle up the freed hair from resticking in the damn Velcro.  I got quite a bit out, leaving a horrendous knot, and only had to cut a bit.  I had no idea what would happen when we got home and untangled the knot.  Surprisingly, the damage wasn’t bad.  You can’t even see where it happened.

Net loss.  Not bad.

Net loss. Not bad.

I read about one blog a week about some kid getting something stuck somewhere or giving themselves some catastrophic haircut.  I got off lucky.  This time.


About larva225

Working mom. Is there any other kind? Geologist. Nerd.
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2 Responses to Stuck On You

  1. my27stars says:

    I’m so glad her hair made it through! I was completely mortified when Doodle got that spirit gum stuck in his hair with the prosthetic elf ear from Halloween, mainly because he was crying his little eyes out, “I don’t WANT you to cut all my hair off!!!”

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