They say you’re never too old to learn new things. I learned some things this weekend:
- Never ever leave urine-soaked clothing sealed up in a plastic bag. It turns to ammonia. Basic chemistry I know, but I simply didn’t think about it. Mom fail.
- All three-year-old children are attorneys in training. They argue about everything. The sudoku puzzle is not a sudoku puzzle. The sky is not blue. It’s maddening. To hell with a mermaid costume this Halloween, dagnabbit. She keeps this merde up, she’s going in a black robe and powdered wig as a magistrate.
- My son may never be weaned. At least not while I’m around. The boy just won’t leave the girls alone. Stella was done by the time she was this age. Done. And while at least I’m finished with pumping, I’d like to think I’m ending my career as a dairy provider soon.
- The power of Disney is strong. Yes, we’re still on the Frozen kick. She got to watch it at Oui Oui’s house on Saturday while Will and I were enjoying some kid-free amusement desperately needed as a result of above point #2. Now she wants to go to Oui Oui’s house constantly. WannagotoOuiOui’shousetowatchthemovieFrozen! After a birthday party yesterday, we had to stop at the grocery store to pick up a few things. She belted out Let It Go from her daddy’s shoulders all throughout the place. Yeah, we’re going to have to buy a copy. Damn you, Walt.
- Tantrums can taint the palate. After a meltdown during a field trip to a strawberry farm which required us to pack up and leave after about a half an hour, she now refuses to eat any. Considering we drove 40 minutes each way and paid $7 a head for 2 quarts of the things, she better eat some F’ing berries.