Booger Nights

Some days are just gross. Yesterday was one of those days.  One of the first things I laid eyes on when I went in the kitchen was a big pile of cat puke.  The bastards usually at least leave it in the vomitorium for me.  Luckily I was way ahead of Felix. I don’t need a second child dining on cat puke (see https://larva225.wordpress.com/2013/06/28/night-of-the-vomit/  for a really funny story).

After everyone had breakfast and got dressed, I ran Stella to school really quick.   Whenever I went to her side of the car to let her out of her safety seat, she pointed out this huge booger on her window and proceeded to tell me how gross it was.  Of course she was the one that put it there.  I learned a valuable lesson when I got home after that:  like cat vomit on carpet, it’s much easier to clean up a booger on glass after it has dried. If you try to clean it while it’s still wet, it just smears. It really is much grosser that way.

Later, I took Felix for about a half hour walk in the stroller.  I’m trying to get really good about walking – even jogging a bit. It occurred to me a few weeks ago that I can’t consider my extra pounds baby weight anymore.  Anyway, me and the little dude were out and about in the neighborhood. I saw no fewer than seven squished frogs on the road.  Technically I guess they were toads. Either way they were kind of stupid.  How does a toad get run over by a car? Why would a toad even be in the road anyway?  The poor things looked like toad jerky.  It was like an epic Frogger Fail.

Why did the chicken cross the road?  To prove she - at least - could reach her destination.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To prove she – at least – could reach her destination.

Another one.  Be glad I didn't take a picture of the booger on glass or cat puke.

Another one. Be glad I didn’t take a picture of the booger on glass or cat puke.

The day ended with yet another refusal to take a bath in the bathtub.  We’re on the 3rd week of no bath, for the record.  When I picked Stella up from school, she was covered in paint, glitter, and what appeared to be sand.  Considering I had let bathing slide the 2 nights previously, there was no way to let it go another night.  With thunderstorms imminent, I managed to drag both kids, naked, into the back yard and hose them down right before- we’re talking seconds –  the thunder and lightning began.  It wasn’t the best bathing job in the world, but I at least got her ratty hair washed and the sand out of her butt crack.

Day 2 of no washing - still not too bad, considering she's taking swim lessons during the day

Day 2 of no washing – still not too bad, considering she’s taking swim lessons during the day

I’m reminded of that awesome episode of MASH where Hawkeye and BJ refuse to bathe as long as Winchester keeps practicing his French horn.  Only my shit isn’t as funny.

Anyone out there dealt with extreme drain terror?  Anyone?  How did you defuse your situation?  As they say in Game of Thrones, “winter is coming” and I can’t bathe my daughter in the backyard forever….

 

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About larva225

Working mom. Is there any other kind? Geologist. Nerd.
This entry was posted in life, Parenting, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to Booger Nights

  1. Meg C. DeBoe says:

    Can you cover/hide the drain? Maybe get a rubber mat and put it over the drain before filling the tub – out of sight/out of mind kind of thing?

  2. boringyear says:

    Can you fill up a big crate or something and dump her in that? No drain…

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