A recent morning conversation:
Me: Stella, we’re going to run late. Please put on your shoes.
Stella: Wow! It’s a firetruck! (on TV)
Me: Stella, we’re going to run late. Put on your shoes. (turning off TV).
Stella: I want stinky chips.
Me: Stella, put on your shoes! Now.
Stella: Chocolate milk?
Me (to Will): Am I speaking f’ing Mandarin this morning?
Will: What did you say? (Staring off into space)
(And people wonder why I just adore red wine.)