One Flew Over the Cous Cous Nest

I’ve recently seen loads of press for shipyourenemiesglitter.com.  As the name implies, it’s a service which will send glitter bombs in the mail to anyone you want to festoon with sparklies.  I guess it’s like anthrax but without the side of Cipro.

From the shipyourenemiesglitter.com webpage  This person is easily agitated, apparently.

From the shipyourenemiesglitter.com webpage This person is easily agitated, apparently.

It’s kind of funny.  I mean, I get it.  Glitter is inconvenient and messy.  And I guess if you’re a grumpy old man, it’ll f$(*# your day up.  But for “enemies?”  Really?

Bunch of pansies.  I have a little girl.  I’ve already been through glitter boot camp.  Hell, my house IS glitter boot camp.  You should see my laundry room when I pull out the lint trap from my dryer.  At least 6 grams of the stuff comes tinkling down from the sparkly gray lint.  Counting what stays trapped in the  lint, I reckon a kilo of glitter comes out of my dryer after every 3-4 loads of laundry.

You want to ship your enemies something really inconvenient?  Try cous cous – dry or cooked.  That shit gets everywhere, and if it’s wet, it sticks.  You have to let it dry out before sweeping it up.  Otherwise, you get hundreds – no, thousands – of semolina smears all over your kitchen floors and counters.

My actual floor about a year ago....the last F'ing time I dared serve cous cous to my children.

My actual floor about a year ago….the last F’ing time I dared serve cous cous to my children.

So maybe that’s my ticket.  I should start my own business to really ruin peoples’ days by causing as much messy havoc as possible.  Cous cous today. Baby oil bombs tomorrow.

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About larva225

Working mom. Is there any other kind? Geologist. Nerd.
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