Everybody Dirts

Kids = dirt and filth.  It’s an unmistakable fact.  Despite this, I try to only bathe them every other day.  I just hate bathing them.  Even though it’s a bit better since I started separating them, it’s still damn messy.  Now it’s just more time-consuming supervising two bath events rather  than one.

I bathed my son last night.  Stella “didn’t want to get wet,” so she promised to shower tonight, sans complaint.  That being said, tonight should have been a breeze: it was an early dismissal (TWO MORE DAYS), so after chilling this afternoon, watching Ink Master, and staging dinner, I could run out with Stella to grab the dude, put her in the shower when we got home, and finish dinner.

Things didn’t work out that way.  When I arrived at his school, his scalp was loaded with sand and glitter – about a 50/50 ratio.  Dammit.  It really was just too much to ignore.  At that point I threw caution to the wind and gave him one of his most favorite things: frozen blueberries.  The kid will eat them by the pint.  Too bad he looks like a smurf when he’s done.  No matter.  Since he needed to cleanse himself of the scalp full of sparkly sand, what harm could come from blueberries? Yeah.  I’m a genius.  There’s a purple ring around my tub and minuscule dunes comprised of sand and glitter all over the bottom.

I did sweep my floors.  I had to.  Sand was everywhere from when I took off his diaper, exposing a butt so covered in sand it almost looked like a pasty sugarplum – a stark contrast to his livid hands and face.  So at this point, my children and floors are semi-clean.  My kids’ tub most definitely is not.  

There are no winners here.


About larva225

Working mom. Is there any other kind? Geologist. Nerd.
This entry was posted in life, Parenting, Uncategorized and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Everybody Dirts

  1. Anxious Mom says:

    Haha, that face! Baby Girl loves blueberries, too, and tried to punch her brother out tonight when she finished hers and he wouldn’t share his.

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