My son has given me a speech impediment.
It started while at the beach. Will had brought his bike along, since the place we stayed had great bike trails. Since my car doesn’t have a bike rack, it got strapped to the roof of the SUV. He used ratchet straps. Felix Precioused a ratchet for several days, somehow miraculously not pinching a finger off. All the while, he chattered on and on and on about his “watchet stwap.” Since arriving home, I’ve had to convince him not to take his watchet stwap wherever he goes (because of course they’re still floating around the floorboards of my car). I have found that I’m unable to say the words correctly. “No, Felix. Your watchet stwap has to stay in the car. They don’t need it at school.”
To make matters worse, Stella has a book on weather floating around in the car. While sitting in traffic, she and Felix look through it and discuss types of storms and clouds. Yesterday Felix started hollering about all the “stwatus clouds” out there. But they weren’t. While correcting him, I incorrectly pronounced stratus.
I’ve turned into a cartoon character.