Rebel Without a Pause

I’m ready.  I’m ready for the Change.  Maybe that sounds crazy.  The truth is, I feel crazy, or at least I did for about 48 hours.

Picture it: it’s Thursday and I’m home alone.  I’m cleaning the bathroom and sobbing.  Nobody likes me.  I’m a failure at work.  My house is digusting.  I’m old and fat.  I’m messing my kids up.  I’m a hot mess.  Now normally I pride myself on being pretty logical, level-headed.  I’m not a sniveling mess with snot running down my face brandishing a toilet brush.

It all made sense last night when I started – about 5 days earlier than I thought.  I had even looked at the calendar earlier that day, inwardly groaning when I realized I’d probably be on day 2 or 3 – the heaviest – while on a major inspection for work next week.  No wonder I had felt like Santa Claus, with a jelly belly.  I could feel it shake when I walked.  I’ve since peed it out.

You would think that after 30 years of dealing with a “monthly visitor” that I’d be used to it.  Nope.   It just seems to get worse.  And now that I’ve closed up the reproductive shop it seems even more aggravating and completely pointless.  I hate yelling at my kids and crying for no good reason and feeling like an insane person.

So bring on menopause.  I ain’t skeeered. 

This, however, is skeeery.

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About larva225

Working mom. Is there any other kind? Geologist. Nerd.
This entry was posted in life, Parenting and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

15 Responses to Rebel Without a Pause

  1. Merbear74 says:

    I’ve been ready for 15 years, lol.

  2. Girl, YES. Right here with you. I’m a hormonal nightmare lately.

    • larva225 says:

      And it just gets worse. I don’t get it.

      • I really try not to be that annoying advice giver…but considering how bad this sh*t su*ks, I’m gonna do it anyway. Multiple forms of Magnesium has helped me tremendously…and up your dose even more once Aunt Flo actually shows her bloody face. I’m 41 & thinking ‘please let this phase of my life end like yesterday. #prayingformenopause

      • larva225 says:

        I may try that. I actually just started taking a multivitamin again so maybe that will help as well.

  3. Cookie says:

    I was seriously just thinking the same thing last month. Like my PMS is exponentially worse now thatn it was before we had kids. At 39 and no plans for more children, what the fuck is the point of my period? An excuse to be a bitch? WHO NEEDS AN EXCUSE FOR THAT/

    • larva225 says:

      I asked my GYN why the hell she put the damn thing back in my body when it was already out of my fucking body during my section (and tying my tubes as well, so a sign that I’m serious about being done and all). She gave me some excuse about bleeding to death due to enlarged blood vessels and such. The nerve….

  4. joey says:

    The horrors of reverse puberty are not told to us in oral tradition the way they should be. I for one will not go down quietly.
    Speak that truth!

    PS: Your brain is totally on fleek today.

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