Load to Nowhere

I feel the need to apologize.  I think once upon a time, my blog was kind of funny.  I mean, I’m no stand-up comedian, but I’ve been told I can be a bit witty.  Lately, I have not been.  Like, at all.

This school stuff has taken over.  It’s made me angry, scared, bitter, anxious, and depressed.  I spent this past Sunday, weeping off and on, sometimes having trouble catching my breath due to nerves.  I went to lunch with Will today – Indian – and he mentioned that he couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen me laugh.  I’ve felt heavy every moment of every day.  This is one of those moments where I need to breathe deep, regroup, and look for the funny, the good.

I had Indian for lunch today with my husband.  The food was amazing, even if it did have carbs in it.  They have this dessert, the name of which I cannot ever remember.  It’s this watery stuff that has rice and fruit in it.  It tastes just like Froot Loops. I could take or leave the cereal, but the dessert is amazing.

Only 11 carpools left!! Hell yes.

I don’t think I mentioned what happened on our recent trip while going through security. Felix, I suppose inspired by the gun in the belt of the TSA agent, decided to share everything about the “powerful gun in his closet,” and how it could kill people.  This was early in the morning, and this surly-looking woman did not look amused.  This was probably why Will was chosen for extra screening.

After we finally made it past the TSA

My children are currently eating roasted turkey.  After the holidays, I turn into some crazy old woman and trawl the grocery stores for sales.  This year, I initially scored a small 8.5 lb Butterball and felt pretty pleased with myself.  A few days later, I found a 25-pounder for even less than I paid for the Butterball.  I had to have it.  In order to make room for the pile of Girl Scout cookies on my counter, I had to make space.  I’m saving the giant bird for Xmas.  I’m easily amused, even if it does feel weird to roast a whole turkey in May.

I will say one more thing about the recent events with school shit, but it’s a positive thing: I’m so grateful for my friend M.  She gets the whole school battle.  She fights it herself.  She lives in the world of parenting ADHD kiddos and has been available at any time to listen, often while we’re both sipping pretty hard on our gin and tonics.  I haven’t had that in such a long, long time.  I didn’t even know I needed it.  There are people that are my friends but not like this.   Most friends didn’t call or ask how things were going, or to see if I needed to talk, get a drink, whatever.  That makes me feel like it’s not something I can talk about at all.  And it’s not just school drama.  We get what it’s like to live surrounded by the noise, the chaos, the little people who sometimes forget to put on pants.  I don’t have to explain to her why I tag my Instagram posts #bombfactory.  M and I have decided that if one of us wins the lotto, A) we’re leaving this godforsaken state and it’s badly broken school system, and B) we’re just going to buy a duplex so we can live next door to each other.  We’d be like Sister Wives without the creepy man-sharing stuff.

So I’m going to try to find my funny again.  I need to.  I don’t think I realized how badly this was affecting me.  Bear with me.



About larva225

Working mom. Is there any other kind? Geologist. Nerd.
This entry was posted in life, Parenting and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Load to Nowhere

  1. desleyjane says:

    The good thing is, we don’t need to be funny all the time. We just need to be. I enjoy reading your posts always.

  2. joey says:

    Is it Kheer? Rice pudding? That stuff is divine!
    When you are feeling heavy, you must do the things that make you feel light. Might I suggest blowing bubbles and cloud-watching? Those are two of my faves. And of course, comedy — in books, movies, shows.
    Also, some me time would be good. I know. I’m just sayin. In case you need the push.

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