Remember how in my last post I was on cloud nine because my kid had kicked an AR quiz’s ass? Yeah, today wasn’t like that. Today was a day where this whole ADHD reared its ugly head.
I know, I know. I shouldn’t bitch. It could be so much worse. My daughter could have another condition – one which wouldn’t allow her to read much less ace a quiz. I’m grateful every day for that. But this ADHD schtick can be tough. She doesn’t look different. There’s nothing obviously wrong with her. And sure. On my defiant days I’d kick your ass if you suggested ADHD = something wrong. She’s amazing. And she’s so fucking smart.
Today was a Daisy Scout day. Meetings can be challenging at times, as they are at the end of a long day and her meds are wearing off. Especially if it’s an unusually busy agenda, you can pretty much guarantee some ass will be shown. There will be outbursts, whining, and some level of hysteria. Getting really honest here, I hate it. I hate watching her become unglued. I hate watching her act like an asshole. And she does. Sometimes she acts like an asshole.
The girls in our troop are used to it, I think. It’s never been openly discussed, but I think our girls know something is different about Stella and that it’s something she can’t control and doesn’t necessarily understand. I’ve seen them rise to the occasion at times, treating my poorly-behaving daughter with kindness. It’s just a small part of why I love them. Today we met with another, younger troop. It was over double the number of girls we’re used to, and it was a busy meeting. We were taking strips of old tshirt and making dog toys for a local shelter. Cute, right?
Only Stella doesn’t know how to braid or even tie any formal knots. There was a pretty typical -for her- outburst. There were some other moms and leaders from the other troop present. One looked at my kid and said rather snidely to her friend that “she is way too sensitive- like WAY too sensitive.”
I was already watching this woman. Earlier when the girls were on the playground I though I had overheard a snarky comment about Stella and “too much drama” when there was a disagreement about a popsicle. Yeah, don’t ask. Anyway, my bitch radar was already pinging.
Y’all, I was pissed. I was so pissed I couldn’t feel my face for a minute. My head swiveled around rather Exorcist-like and I said to this woman “She has ADHD.” This woman looked at me all conspiratorially and said “Oh!” I looked directly into her eyes and said -possibly through gritted teeth, “That’s MY kid.”
You may be thinking I’m the one being too sensitive. Maybe I am. But part of it was that this was a Girl Scout meeting – a Girl Scout meeting full of 5-7 year old girls. And if you or your kid is involved in this organization? I expect more of you. I expect better behavior. I expect that you will NOT act like an asshole, that you will keep your bitchy judgemental comments tucked neatly under your ponytail.
So yeah. Today was not so good. Today was a day when I remember why I worry about mundane things like summer camp or 2nd grade. Today the ADHD won. Hopefully I’ll kick its ass tomorrow.