I’ve missed this. I’ve missed y’all. It’s been so busy lately, WordPress has become one of those things you occasionally stop and sigh wistfully about. There have been birthdays, family drama (which I’d love to
process write about here, but it’s not my story to tell), school functions, homework, Girl Scout obligations, including a craft debacle involving hot glue guns. Three of the four in my little tribe have had/are having birthdays. I’m 44 now. Wow.
My birthday was good. Will managed to pull one over on me and actually surprised me with flowers in the morning (meaning he had to buy them, stash them with water somewhere I wouldn’t look, and then retrieve them after I’d gone to bed the night before) as well as this amazing Star Wars necklace I had wanted. I got lots of Facebook love, lots of calls and messages. The ladies at work decorated my cube and left me some goodies. I got some lunches. I’m a lucky
old fart girl.
I was asked by my kids’ school to come in and talk to all the students about landfills during their “green week.” I love that shit. I could do it every day. To manage to get kids excited about dumps is a pretty cool thing. The older ones asked so many questions that the teacher in charge had to shut them down. The younger ones got distracted by my picture of Will and his homemade hummingbird feeder made from his 3D printer and some empty water bottles in my “how to help keep things out of landfills” section. They asked me all about hummingbirds. I knew nothing, Jon Snow. But I’m hoping to be able to do more of that stuff now that they know I can speak in complete sentences and don’t have a soporific effect on my audiences.
Now the big thing – the thing I need help wrapping my head around for whatever reason. It’s time to take the plunge and have Felix evaluated for ADHD. Honestly, I’m not surprised. I had hoped like hell this wouldn’t happen, that he’d get to big kid school and start to toe the line, peer pressure and all that jazz. Nope. He makes animal noises, machine noises. He refuses to learn his ABCs, telling his teacher he’ll “get to it later.” During my landfill talk, he spun around and around like a top on his butt, despite the fact that his MyMom was there talking.
So I had a conference. By then, I had already made the appointment. And no matter how much you steel yourself and predict exactly what’s going to be said, it’s never easy hearing negative shit about your kid, especially when this is supposed to be your “easy” kid. This is my little bitty dude – my funny charismatic child, my son that still comes and finds me at night to snuggle with.
So I’m looking potentially at another 14 years of quarterly med checks and picking up hard copies of prescriptions and then filling them at the exact right time – because glob help you if you try to fill it too early or too late. And my god, what about summers? Now I’ll have not one but two kids to worry myself to death about camp-hopping and possible bullying. Can he/they behave? Is he/are they getting too stressed by the upheaval?
I’m looking at being the only non-ADHD person in my household. It’s a lonely idea, which I suppose is a stupid thing to say as these people never stop talking. I hate it, y’all. I’m sad about it. I’m pissed about it. I can’t believe in my mind I’ve already resigned myself to medicating a 4 year old.
But how can I not? I’ve seen the wonders it’s done for Stella. I now see that, as ridiculous as it sounds, my 4 year old very-bright-child is at risk for falling behind because he’s unable or unwilling to participate and learn what he’s “supposed” to because he’s running around trying to demonstrate what a “strong powerful male” he is. I see the kindergarten teachers across the hall from his classroom, and I don’t think I could face catching an expression on their faces as they look at my son, obviously thinking “I don’t want THAT kid in my classroom next year.”
So yeah. That’s what’s been going on. Lots of digestion and coping. Lots of juggling appointments and conferences and work and house stuff (please don’t look at my floors or commodes right now).
I’d just like to go shopping and have some champagne for a while.
Y’all have a good weekend!